capturing the beautiful calamity of healing in therapy

Tag: therapy

You Wanted To Know How To Love Yourself

You Wanted To Know How To Love Yourself

You wanted to know how to love yourself because you knew loving yourself was important.  You also wanted to know why you hurt so much inside, and why, no matter what you did, you felt inferior, incompetent, and ashamed. Unfortunately, you were also in love […]

Does My Therapist Think About Me? Everything Between the Sessions

Does My Therapist Think About Me? Everything Between the Sessions

You always wondered, does my therapist think about me? One of our first sessions. You told me you went to therapy years ago and that question constantly nagged at you. What did that therapist think of you? Did she judge your stories? Did your secrets […]

Therapy Beyond the Problem

Therapy Beyond the Problem

Enter our therapy session. She was cordial but reserved. Friendly, but still distant. Showed up to therapy every week, but seemed dubious and calculating. When we first started working together, she admitted she didn’t really believe in therapy or counseling, and that was okay, because, […]

It’s not about the problem. It’s about how we cope with it.

It’s not about the problem. It’s about how we cope with it.

Mary just seemed to be branded with perpetual bad luck. There’s really no other way to put it. She literally seemed cursed. She started therapy soon after sustaining a life-threatening injury and now needed to cope with the aftermath of chronic pain and forced unemployment.When we first […]

The S.T.U.C.K Series: Part 2

I know what I need to do, but I just can’t do it.  In the first part of this series, I described the foundation for my S.T.U.C.K theory, outlining the acronym “scared to undergo change and/or knowledge.” Feeling stuck is one of the most prevalent problems […]

The Client who Hated Therapists

She was broken when I first met her. These were her words, not mine, and she hated therapists. Barely made eye contact, hair hanging long in front of her face, a hollow shell of trauma laden with all the resulting symptoms that come from that- scars up […]

7 signs therapy is working

It is no secret that mental health professionals constantly argue about how to define progress and change. This is why I adamantly believe there are Fifty Shades of Recovery. Successful treatment will always be subjective, and concise results are rarely black-and-white. But with all these […]

So You Wanna Be a Therapist?

I’m really, really lucky because I’ve basically wanted to be a therapist as soon as I needed to pin down and figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up Because of that, I was fortunate enough to start my career and brave this […]

The Chaotic Fallacy We Call Control

The Chaotic Fallacy We Call Control

Control is a word we throw around loosely, though the complexity of its meaning remains largely misunderstood. The serenity prayer, a beautiful mantra frequently used in Twelve Steps philosophy, God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the […]