capturing the beautiful calamity of healing in therapy

Tag: mft intern

Licensed in the State of California

Licensed in the State of California

I have been officially licensed for one month! In a nutshell, this means I completed graduate school, attained 3000 clinical hours in a variety of categories, and passed two licensing exams. The Board of Behavioral Sciences gathered all this information and deemed me competent to reach […]

The S.T.U.C.K Series: Part 2

I know what I need to do, but I just can’t do it.  In the first part of this series, I described the foundation for my S.T.U.C.K theory, outlining the acronym “scared to undergo change and/or knowledge.” Feeling stuck is one of the most prevalent problems […]

When the Healing Hurts

When the Healing Hurts

Years ago, after several continuous no-shows and the dreaded feeling I had that she wasn’t coming back, one of my clients walked in, nervously admitting her apprehension about therapy. After I left,  I felt worse, she said. I can’t go through with this if it’s going to make me feel worse […]

Happiness & Brushing Your Teeth

What are your goals for therapy? Client shrugs. Looks down at the ground, uncertain with herself, uncertain with everything around her, nervous and clearly uncomfortable in her own skin. I don’t know. I just want to be happy.  Every therapist in every office has heard this […]

The Client with “The Terrible Condition”

Alice sobbed the entire first session. They were guttural and visceral sobs, the kind where nobody speaks, because nobody knows how, and the language exchanged is colored with misery and utter hopelessness. Fifty minutes passed with hardly a word, but she stated she would see […]

The Client who Hated Therapists

She was broken when I first met her. These were her words, not mine, and she hated therapists. Barely made eye contact, hair hanging long in front of her face, a hollow shell of trauma laden with all the resulting symptoms that come from that- scars up […]

How To Charge Your Emotional Batteries

Nothing runs forever without maintenance, and we are no different. Just like the cell phones so many of us are hooked to, we frequently run ourselves to “low battery,” and this existence can drain our happiness, affect our physical functioning, and harm our relationships. Just […]

Why I Cannot Tell You How to Live Your Life

Well, what do YOU think I should do? It’s a question most well-intentioned clients ask at one point or another, during an especially frustrating, gridlocked situation. It feels like an appropriate and even harmless question. After all, aren’t you just trying to make the right […]

Validation: The Glue of Any Relationship

If I could teach a lesson to everyone in the world, if someone gave me the task of teaching all my clients JUST ONE THING to improve their social relationships and happiness with others, it would be the art of validation. Validation is the foundation […]

7 signs therapy is working

It is no secret that mental health professionals constantly argue about how to define progress and change. This is why I adamantly believe there are Fifty Shades of Recovery. Successful treatment will always be subjective, and concise results are rarely black-and-white. But with all these […]